Sunday, December 18, 2011

Well this is confusing. .

To my love,

It has become apparent that I do not want to go days without interaction with you, (euphemism for 'cannot live without you') and that is something I'm okay with. At times I feel like we will not last but those days are brilliantly combated whenever I see you or am around you. While my youth beckons me to live recklessly, bouncing from woman to woman, indulging in my young age, it is my overwhelmingly deep attachment to you that keeps me from doing anything that would hurt you.

lost train of thought. .

it's currently 5:30 in the morning.

I feel casually clingy, which I know is an oxymoron but it is just crazy. I want you, if I was to have anybody. No other girl is as reliable and supportive, and outright beautiful to top it off. You're easily one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen, and without a doubt the most beautiful I have ever been with. Yes, sometimes I feel like you do not, and will not understand me. Yes, our views on life are completely skewed but . . more like 'so'. . why are you dealing with me and vice versa? Do you only like the idea of me in a very Tyler Perry-esque type of way? Meaning, "intelligent, God-fearing, Black men are so hard to find. If you get one, hold on to them Are you battling your inner thoughts (couldn't think of another phrase) only in hopes that you'll convert me to Christianity and completely my views altogether. If you seek to ultimately change me then I'm utterly saddened to tell you that you are wasting your time.

I love you.
always will.
I don't want to see you with any other person. Sadly, if that happens, I will not want to further communication with you.
At least not at this point.
And I think that you'd be okay with that anyway.

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