No caption needed, love. I just hope you know.

The next broad I hear say something like, "I think like a guy," I know what's up. All three chicks I've heard say this and dealt with afterwards. . Weren't.exactly.frigid. smh

I think their sexual habits bother me so much because their recklessness puts me in danger. And since some diseases could take years to appear, I'm still not in the clear. All I do is just shake my head. This picture is 100% true, word to moms.

I absolutely hate the way I've been feeling.

I love feeling feelings. I just hate not knowing why I am feeling them. Is something missing? Is something too much?

I really think it's Alex. She hasn't been acting the same and my brain has been WONDERING. Like. Crazy. I've almost convinced myself that she wants to be with someone else. Just about. I've pulled two UNNECESSARY AS FUCK all nighters and I've had shit food and I've shat for dear life all in the last 3 days. Oh and I haven't lifted at all. It's safe to say that week 9 is a big fat FAIL. Fuckkkk, Alexaundrea. It sucks the most because I know you're affecting me like this. I don't want anyone else. You're a perfect fit in my life right now. I've been playing "Clean" all day because of you.

"Say what you will. Say what you meann. You could never offend. Your dirty words come out clean...." *continues to sing in my head.

Tr' Vel,

You are going to lose your bone/meat/cheese. Stop worrying about stupid shit. I understand that you love being proved right about distrusting people. You know very few men deserve your trust, 4 at this point, and no women at all. You have no reason to worry about anything but Alexaundrea. She's who cares about you. And as of yet, you haven't found in her any untruthfulness. Your last venture was an example for a lot of women in this world. We got burned. We learned a lesson. And before her, we got scorched. And before her, we got destroyed. So I understand, Brother. I know how shiesty these females can be, but you have the best one you know. Ha, do you understand that????? The best chick you know tells you she loves you!! You.fucking.Idiot! You need to appreciate her more! Now.

but just for tonight, let us be assured that we were not crazy. .She could not/can not/will not be trusted as far as they can be smelled. . Don't ever distrust your gut, G. Your gut has never spoken against Alex, until recently so keep her close.

After Tonight.

I'm humbled. .

I'm hardened.

I'm contemplative.

and

Apparently,

I ain't shit.

Yet.

God is Love. My Love is Music.

Therefore. . .

skip the title. . got to get this out before I lose the inspiration or the battery on my now dying computer. .

It amazes me how we, as humans, continuously become so possessive over things that, not only, Don't belong to us but Never did! Prime motherloving (sorry, Moms saw how vulgar my blog voice can be and it has me messed up. . I'll be back soon) example. Significant others. Unless you did some highly illegal incest type stuff, or you married your slave, your significant other will Never. . I repeat NEVER be Yours. A piece of paper (marriage license) or overly expensive ring will never prove such. We all crap (this is killing me!) sleep and eat and none of us have legitimate power over the other. They are going to do what makes them happy at the end of it all, if they have any sense, that is. And it perplexes me that we get so upset about such an infinitesimal aspect of our lives. I no longer believe in that "one soulmate" bs. Why not? I just told you, it's BS. Too many people on this world. Too many people on it before us. Too many similarities. Too many attractions. You don't "find a soulmate". You never will. You stop searching when you are content. As you should, but still, don't go out there thinking that there is only one. It's wishful thinking, but I mean, damn. - I now have to scroll to the top to see why I started this post. lol *This 2 Door cinema has me going*

Oh Right! Moral of the post, unless you date someone who hasn't had anyone before you, throw that possessiveness out of the window. Man is motivated by happiness and pleasure. If you are fitting, you will fill the void, there's rarely much more to it than that. Just to prove my point. . Divorce. You don't sincerely get married if you don't think they are "the ONE for you." So what happens? They stop being themselves? The selves they were born as and were before they knew you? Do all marriages end because somebody "changes" or are they no longer filling that void? Furthermore, to sort of stomp out that "soulmate" concept. How about that one little thing, ahh, you know, RE-MARRYING. And every time, they swear to the God they promised to that they're REALLY the one. FUCK outta here.

*wheewww, that felt good. =]